You are fading, so am I and our eyes go so slow and mine fade into you ...so good and wise and strong to go slow, i wanna hold the hand inside you like firey embers into the night....Yes, that burning feeling inside comes again and again and I cant help but think what you were thinking while I was lost in the air of infinity. water, earth air and fire. I am made mostly of Air, water and fire....so maybe you thought you knew. I never thought that my love for you would be anything less than an offering true..... But where were you my little disconnected soul, my valetine? It was when you continued to insist I open my trust....that we melted together....yet, as soon as I did you ran so far away from love. Oh my dear darling.....my peter pan.... see you never knew.
..."FUCK ME THAT WILL WILL SAVE ME" just like some sort of Kathleen Turner Crime of Passion, it doesn't dismiss reality...fuck me me, kiss me, save me...there are these nights like this when I imagine you are asleep in bed in our little love chapel that we created and those nights and those nights burn for you and I. But it's me that's here right now. I am the ony Joan of Arc burning due to a truth that you could not contain. Maybe I was was a whole lotta too much mother air, fire, water for you and you were just running scared to be free, I suppose I will never know what was and what will never be. You made your exit though my open door, no integrity.
Dear fog and shade, I only asked you to brush my hair after a bath but no instead you dismissed that sweetness for a fuck, for fuckery and fucked me. Can't you see fiction doesn't win you luck...slowly, tenderly it me you fucked. you fucked my locks came in and then you fucked me. yeah. fuck brushing my hair ever so sweetly. falling into those many nights I gave you a prayer, a bed and those nights.....brushing my hair. I was always here but you left long before that, I could smell it on your flesh and I was burning. You, you couldn't even begin with that..you wanted to go straight for it, the concept of time wasn't enough for you. Nor has it ever been. You wanted it to happen and happen right now again, with your running away.... so when you're love lorned tired and true and no surprise doesn't speak cryptic to you... look into my eyes and there will still be a soft pinpoint opening into my blues...just no longer , not anymore it isn't enough to pull us through, I'm filled inside but it wasn't enough for you...you haven't enough....hiding your own true blue behind what you could, would never be or do ...blue pulsating veins needs a shot upside down. We can't connect. Stillness. Expect. Disconnect without hiding you hid.
So you just weren't enough according to you and you had no will to save you through. Then that's when the light broke and the dawning fell into my hand....and my hand writing began to sound like firefly wings, shape shifting into a hot warm nest and my voice beats to a tune of tongues. My mouth kisses third eye spring appearing in Autumn. Times are strange, like a summer cold wave without you.... you, my so lost love. You, you haven't a clue, my sweet darling, my sweet darling do you? I think about it as life isn't suppose to be an escapade of trials alone as hands are supposed to be held, hair is suppose to be brushed, souls are suppose to be loved, working together for higher ground, that is love. Why do you lie to yourself? I heard the thunder then you running, running to the darkest black hole you could find, i'm not selling out on my vision, prisims of softly colored light.
And, so now here we are both laying like metamorphoses in the night. i scream stars on the ceiling that burst into bright. I've laid out a song, laid it out for you....a song for your best to the future.....to life.....past , present, future. An abundance of knowing more than you know for we all know nothing that is true.
Words © Wendy Rose Watson
