I feel just like Winona Ryder in that movie about Vampires. And she couldn't get that 'accent' right....neither could that other guy...
I was taught as a little girl that If you like anything about yourself you're going to be punished, if you were taught that as I was, don't buy it....love yourself and project that outwardly even at times if it means burning with word, in art and your daily in and out job that you are so fortunate to have. Make your statement. Love yourself. You are not doomed nor selfish when you're in that state of being. You're alive and living what is rightfully yours and true. People will judge you so be up for it but don't allow their judgement to infect you into a non-loving state of being. Don't let it color your decision making to be something that you are not or that you do not feel is true for you. Move forward with integrity and be honest with yourself and those around you as you will connect with the right people when you're truly in alignment with self. Also, keep in mind that sometimes those people judging are the right people for you, too...they may help you define what you will and will not tolerate in this life and what boundaries you need to set for yourself. Be who you are. Celebrate your existence even if it means being alone and celebrating by yourself. Those hours alone are gems, hidden treasures and will open doorways for you. Doorways that not only exist in your mind but doorways into the next reality and remember nothing lasts forever outside of love so keep inside of it. Love is infinite and it's looking you straight in the eye right now, all you need is a mirror to see.
You've been conditioned to believe that you were born to be a slave to the master. This is untrue. You were born to be a master of love. No crime committed, but a terrible and beautiful vision to see. So many twist and turns on the road in this world we live in today. So make noise in the hallways and command the door to open as the poems don't love anymore. They will not suffice. It is all within YOU. Not the cold or rainy as I'm not much nourished by modern love either. I've seen the silver knives flashing in my bridal negligee. Experiment within the maze, your maze and continue to worship the feeling it creates inside of you. I've certainly ripped my heart out on paragraphs but whatever you do don't fuck the dead people, don't fuck them now.
The lonely and the night of hands always relies on self. Hands and eyes that are our brightest diamonds, yet so faint and sometimes falling from the sky not bright enough. So keep the doors of perception open and open them wide. Open to higher thinking and open on the alter of prayer. Loving is not only a state of mind, it's a state of being, so let love in ...love, a voice in the night that says, "You are not alone" and when hunger speaks precise instruction know that you are one of the chosen ones - you know you can never leave yourself, you have been chosen and you are the master. It's not too early for the rainbow. It's not too late for the dove. This is the shield against the quarrels even if your name was once instructed to be the foundation of the night. LOVE YOURSELF. BE YOURSELF. Write your redemption song tonight. It's alright. We are all just finches in the mist world but whatever you do don't fuck the dead people, don't fuck them now.
Words © Wendy Rose Watson